WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

Q: I've been having health issues, mostly skin related since November.
The doctors can't figure out what's going on - the condition is doubly
rare since it's a rare complication of a genetic mutation. (I love
doctor-speak. Basically, when they took me through rounds at the large
teaching hospital, the medical staff was all excited since they'd only
read about this stuff in text books. I've been biopsied, probed,
pricked, bled and examined up the yin yang with each new doctor coming
in only to exclaim how rare this is--"more likely for you to win the
lottery!" Now, they want me to travel up to New Haven to see the only
guy who's doing research into this. *sigh* On the whole, I'd rather
have won the lottery, I think.) Needless to say, work was strained
since clothes *hurt* and let's not mention the effect this all had on
both my love life and my self esteem. What could be going on with me?

A: It seems like you're having quite a time. For one thing, you know you're
just completing your Chiron return, and Chiron is semisextile your Sun
natally. This usually manifests as Chiron working on your essential being
(as represented by the Sun) in a way that you're not necessarily aware of
because the semi-sextile doesn't operate in full consciousness. Chiron
(the wounded healer)puts pressure on us to revisit old wounds so they can
be healed, and with the semi-sextile the wounds are evident but you may
not be immediately aware of the channel for healing. The Chiron return is
a time when old issues come to the surface to be healed and dealt with,
hence the so-called "mood swings" of menopause.

First the good news: Pluto is just now beginning a trine to natal Pluto,
which is an exhilarating time of transformation and rebirth. It's a time
when it's easy to let go of old issues and problems that no longer serve
you, and move forward into a life that is authentic and true. Mars in
your chart makes a trine to Pluto, so you have your personal will (Mars)
in harmony with the will of your higher self (Pluto). This is an
excellent position for manifestation, as your higher self is there to
assist you to obtain what you desire. Transiting Pluto is also trine
Mars, facilitating your journey to activate the warrior self within you.

Mars in your chart (the most fiery planet), is in Aries which it rules,
but along with being trined by Pluto it is opposed by Neptune which acts
like a literal wet blanket. Further, Mars is squared by your
Jupiter/Uranus conjunction, which would normally act as a catalyst for
Mars but they're both retrograde in your chart so there's a lot of false
starts in terms of your expressing your will which is what Mars is all
about. Your Pisces Sun isn't comfortable with aggression, and your
Aquarius Moon and Mercury may try to suppress your emotional needs,
Aquarius loves to be rational and doesn't really like emotions. It may be
difficult to express your needs to others, and to find the energy within
yourself to defend your boundaries and to feel anger when it is
appropriate. When emotions of vulnerability and anger don't find
expression, they do tend to erupt in health problems.

It's always interesting to me when doctors can't find a cause for a health
problem, and it can sometimes be found in an imbalance in the chart.
Louise Hay says that anything involving the skin is connected to our sense
of individuality, being "comfortable in our own skin."

If this rings true to you, you may need to start expressing your more
emotions in a productive way, particularly the more aggressive ones. I
find with my clients that the best way to manage a fire problem is through
vigorous and intense physical activity. Pisces love things like tai chi,
but that's not intense enough to bring us in touch with Mars within us.
Think Xena - intense hiking, weight lifting which requires contacting an
intensity within us that we don't normally reach. Kickboxing, or just
going out into the woods and hitting something hard.

The good news is most of this is behind you, but you do have some Saturn
transits kicking up in September. Saturn transits are great for making us
stronger but they can be challenging, so the more you can clear out from
this series of evolutionary challenges the more you'll breeze through the
Saturn transits!!