Live-in relationships and the sixth house
Every Friday I dig into the archives for something interesting to share with you. This post has been updated from an earlier article.
A great article from Jeffrey Kishner illustrates the flexibility of house rulership in the astrological world of symbols. It’s easy when we’re studying astrology to become rigid about certain things, like house rulers. For example, we tend to always put relationships in the seventh house of marriage and partnership. But relationships can fall under quite a few houses: casual romances in the fifth house, making a home together in the fourth, sexual intimacy and joint financial ventures in the eighth, creating a business together in the tenth, and developing a solid friendship in the eleventh.
But when we’re living with someone else, the mundane realities that we find in the sixth house come into play. As Jeff writes:
So much of a long-term relationship is the sharing of life on a day-to-day basis. The mundane, daily activities — grocery shopping, fixing up the house or apartment, taking the kids to soccer, reading the paper — are 6th house activities. They’re routine.
The routine can be comforting — it is often what draws people into relationships (e.g., “I want someone with whom I can share my bed every night”) — but it can also be stifling. Perhaps the question of whether an affair is “real” is whether this relationship can survive the 6th house experience. If you leave your boyfriend/husband for your lover and move in together, the habits might be different, but this is also when many of his flaws become apparent — those habits that annoy you.
The little details can be endearing, or they can drive you crazy.
Of course, you don’t have to live together […]
As an astrologer I am often asked for an analysis of compatibility between two charts. “Is this person my soulmate?” is usually the way the question is phrased. The idea that there is one perfect person who is just made for us, a “twin flame” as it is often described, is a captivating one. We may feel that once we find this perfect person, who harmonizes with us in every way, we would feel whole and complete and our lives would be made more satisfactory.