A client writes with some vivid imagery:
I’m very, very tired… the past 45 days have been killer for me, and though I know “That which does not kill us, makes us stronger,” I wish I hadn’t gotten all of these bullets at the same time! I don’t know if you’ve seen the X-Men movies, but at the end of X-Men III, a great scene is when Wolverine is trying to get to Phoenix/Jean Grey, and she keeps on sending stuff his way, and it’s basically constantly peeling bits of his skin away while he’s continually healing/regrowing it (one of his ‘mutation’ powers), but he continues to push his way towards her, even though it gets harder and harder. THAT’S how I’ve felt the last month-and-a-half. But I’m not sure towards what I’m pushing my way, besides trying to SURVIVE right now!!
It looks like your energy level is being sapped by Neptune. Neptune is the planet that seeks to dissolve our material reality and show us that there is a life of spirit that lies beyond our material world. In the process of doing this it can create a lot of confusion and cause us to feel that we are walking through a pea-soup fog in our life. Neptune first crossed your Sun/ Midheaven conjunction back in March of 2007, retrograded and hit again throughout the month of August, and will make its final pass around January Between now and then, though, it will be within one degree of your Sun, which is your essential self, and the Midheaven which is one of the strongest points in your chart. This is affecting how you view not only your role in the world but your identity in general, and it is no doubt making it difficult for you to see your way through. Aquarius is so rational and reasonable, it has difficulty dealing with the Neptunian uncertainty.
The reason the past couple of months has hit you the hardest is that you have hard a series of Mars transits which have endeavored to pump up your energy but working against the Neptune influence was just too hard. It’s as if having lots of energy you go into the gym and start lifting weights that are twice what you normally would do to try to overcome the funk, you end up fatigued. You have a challenge with Mars and Neptune anyway because they are conjunct in your chart. I’m sure I recommended vigorous physical activity to you and that is still the best advice!! Activating Mars in your chart through intense physical activity helps to generate more energy for you. But Neptune also requires surrender and patience as your true destiny