Eric Francis has a hilarious takeoff on the recent news articles demoting Pluto:
Today’s session of the International Astronomical Union (IAU) general assembly had yet another surprise outcome, as astronomers voted overwhelmingly that the Earth is not a planet.
“We are just following the laws of science,” said Prof. Melvin Peabody of Yale University’s Bush Observatory, announcing the vote at a hastily convened news conference.
There were several discussion points on the Earth issue. First, it was established that no scientist discovered the Earth. No record of it could be found in the planetary catalogues, and after searching the night sky for many years, no scientist has seen it through a telescope.
“We tried looking through both ends, as well,” said Dr. Karl Zeiss of the University of Okoboji’s Planetary Science Department. “It was a long and fruitless search. We even tried looking during the day, when the light was better, but we didn’t find anything. I was deeply disappointed. I had hoped that would find the Earth somewhere out there.”
The presence of street lights on Earth also seemed to help tip the scales.
“This is a bizarre phenomenon,” said Dr. David Edison, 12th cousin of the inventor of the light bulb. “And it can only happen here. We have seen street lights nowhere else, not even on Uranus. I am forced to conclude that if there are street lights, it must not be a planet. I have no other choice.”
All kidding aside, this is a truly momentous event in so many ways. Astrology teaches that all of life is synchronistically connected, and I have no doubt that hidden in this event is an illuminating discovery for astrologers as well. I’ll keep posting more as I continue to ponder…